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Index » Issues & News » Spirituality Issues
 

How The Bible Addresses Your "Interpersonal Issues"

 

Author: Dr. Yvonne LaMar

In the interest of transparency, Ill share that whenever I write or speak about a principle or situation, God arranges for me to have an experience that helps me understand it on a deeper level. It makes me careful about what I say. It also keeps me aware that whatever I think I know has more depth and dimensions that I can personally grasp.

I pray for my lessons to come gently. Through His Grace I am prepared to receive lessons in the way that I will understand them. Thats how I know that the lesson was for me. Yvonne 101, Remedial Dr. LaMar, Intro to Sisterly Love, or Romantic Relationships for the Beginner.

Then, every once in a while, I get a life lesson that I did not know I needed. Honestly, sometimes I dont want to get the bottom of the issue. I can accept that I will always have shortcomings. Everyone has issues. Who wants to be in the middle of a lesson that they didnt ask for? Then reality sets in and I realize that until the lesson is learned it will only repeat itself.

My most recent revelation has been that our issues are reflected in the company we keep. Have you ever left a conversation or gathering wondering why you feel a certain way? Those life lessons that catch me off guard are usually the result of interacting with other people. There two ways to look at the way these issues surface.

First, there are some things you would never know about yourself unless you are around other people. Yes, interpersonal issues! Yankees have no idea how fast we talk or what accent we have until Texans inform us. The entire social food chain is built on ones ability to interact with certain types of other people. Get in where you fit in is an old expression that my mother used. If an issue is persistent, you might be spending time in the wrong crowd.

If not fitting in were more noticeable, it would be easy to remedy. The hard part about this issue is that you can look like everyone, sound like them, share lots of experiences, and still manage to have problems relating. It is hard to avoid blaming yourself when everybody else seems happy about the way things are going.

Second, some attitudes are contagious. Its easy to think its your problem when it really is not. This life lesson is especially painful because you waste a great deal of time working on yourself only to have the issues resurface again and again. People are so important, both socially and on a personal level. Its amazing how much these simple interactions can affect our days and sometimes our whole lives.

The worst thing about bad attitudes is that the people who possess them refuse to keep it to themselves. I think they need proof that their terrible outlook really exists and they bring you down so they can get a verbal confirmation. Just a theory! OK, a theory from someone who has fallen for this trick too many times.

No matter what life lesson is brought to my attention, I know that it always comes down to faith. God supplies for all of our needs, so why are other people so important? Its a Sunday kind of question that finds me all through the week. I blame my profession. I do research. I rely on statistics. Observations of every day events are what mold my views. Wanting to know why is a gift and a burden. Ill leave certainty to the Bible.

It is not good for man to be alone. Dealing with people can be complicated. If you are the self-reflecting type, just make sure that you are working on the right person.

Author Bio:

Dr. Yvonne LaMar

Dr. LaMar is a Philadelphia, Pennsylvania native who studied at Temple University (BA - Psychology) and University of Pennsylvania (MSEd - Psychological Services). She went on to receive an MS and PhD in Educational Psychology and Measurement from Cornell University.

Dr. LaMar's first book, "God Provides the Sacrifice: Women DIscuss Making Their Hardest Decisions" is informed by her extensive training and years of experience as a counselor, trainer, and administrator for Women's Programs in Pennsylvania and New York. Her second book, "Drama Free Worplace" was written while consulting. developing and evaluating educational programs around the country.

She has presented her research in international forums and contributed to several books and publications about women's issues, human development, moral reasoning and qualitative research.

She currently resides in West Texas where she is an Professor of Education and administrator. Current projects include educational programming for faith-based organizations, grant writing, and researching mentorship relationships among professional women.

If your organization can benefit from her expertise please contact us at info@drlamar.com or telephone us at 806-293-4094.

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